How to find a Girlfriend or Boyfriend

This is a global struggle, regardless of whether or not the person has a disability.

“Professionals” say that wants with people with disabilities tell them include: drive a car, get a job, get a GF/BF

What about internet dating?

  • Socializing online is an option
  • Internet safety is critical
  • SHEP is hosting a seminar on the topic of internet safety.
  • Any online activities require ongoing technology support.

Kentucky law: If you have an intellectual disability, you can’t have sex–this could be used as a fallback to avoid having to deal with this issue at all.

Finding a GF/BF involves making friends first. And how do we do that in general? You get to know someone who shares mutual interests. (Importance of being friends was re-emphasized.)

Definition of intimacy = into me you see.

Everyone has the right to take care of one’s self and accepting oneself.

What prevents us from having:

  • Speed dating
  • Parties

Discussion of recent agency Super Bowl party and how successful it was

  • What would a party look like?
  • Potluck
  • At someone’s house
  • Open invitation
  • Fraternities and sororities have service component
  • Jesus prom (once a year) (popular)
  • Monthly?
  • Needs to be recurring
  • Could have in person and online components
  • Take input from people!
  • Skype
  •–online interest based, where people say what they are interested in and are connected to others with the same interests. Can take it to in person meetings or network.
  • Singles mixers
  • Facilitating friend introductions.
  • Social safety must be embedded across all settings (in person or online.)
  • Guardian situations can be social opportunities.

 If you prove that you can make good decisions, people will trust you (but sometimes people make mistakes, and that’s okay.”

Bottom line = There needs to be more opportunities for social interactions.

ACTION STEPS: Lots of possibilities were discussed (plan a party, night out, bars, music, etc), but ultimately the group recognizes that recreation means very different things to each of us. We decided to think about what this topic meant to each of us, and post our thoughts on the UnConference Facebook page/blog.



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